Time To Get Healthy - So What's Stopping Me

Well I've gathered all my ducks and got them in a row, so what's the problem?
This past week I've been gathering up everything I can to get ready for beach weather.  Honestly it was more to just get back to me.  But something's wrong.  I'm not feeling so well and I have to wonder why.  I was really excited I ordered my first work out video in years from ebay,  I've been reading the books you see above about diet, exercise and even motivation.  I dug out the weights that have been gathering dust and have never before been used.  I  even bought me the cutest red, white and blue tennis shoes.  Okay so those aren't exactly made for workouts but they were made for cuteness and summer.  How could I pass them up for only $10.00 at Kmart.  We get our meds filled there and I always find something else I need or don't need. (Btw - this is not a paid review post, this is about me). 


For the past few weeks I have been getting more and more fatigued for no reason at all.  I assumed it was because I was just getting use to being super lazy or that it was just one of my fluctuations with depression.  But now I'm having concerns that it's more.  I can't stay up very long.  I sleep all the time and wake up not rested.  I'm up late at night working on the computer and I thought that my schedule is just so out of wack that, that might be the problem.  Sometimes I go to bed at daylight and it takes me hours to wind down yet my body feels tired. I slept on and off for nearly 24 hours a few days ago.


And then there's the weight.  All my life I never had to diet, my metabolism was always very high.  I assumed the weight was due to getting older and just plain lazy and out of shape.  Okay, the month of Easter Peeps didn't help either.  But lately I don't feel like I've been eating as much. My stomach feels kind of nauseous when I eat.  So when I weighed in at the grocery store the other day and gained a half pound I was surprised.  When I went 2 days later and had gained 3 lbs, well I was in shock and disbelief!!!  What the heck's going on?


I've got a small frame (I'm only 5'3" with small bones).  I feel like I've been poured full of lead.  Most of all, my left arm is a total distraction to me.  Lots of tingling and feels like someone is poking me with little hot needles.  My chest is really heavy and sometimes it seems a little hard to breath.  And now even my legs are feeling heavy.  I'm to the point of wanting to go to bed and have someone wait on me hand and foot.  But that's no good because then I just feel even worse with the guilt of putting everything on Neil.  He's been so patient.


I've got Drs. appointments set up for June but I told Neil if I don't feel better tomorrow I'm ready to go to the emergency room.  I just hate to go and hear everything's fine.  Well you know what I mean.  Of course I want everything to be fine, I just hate making a fuss out of nothing and feel really stupid for going in and being told your getting old and fat.


So while my enthusiasm may have waned my desire to loose weight and just feel overall healthier hasn't.  Did you notice I even put a new Weight Loss Ticker in the upper left sidebar? 

I found this free program called my fitness pal online.  This way I can put in my weight and measurements and how much I would like to lose and they keep track of everything for me.  They even have an easy to use Food Diary to count the calories you've consumed at each meal and snacks.  Even a water consumption chart to encourage and remind you of how much you need to drink.  Again I was not asked to write this.  I just found the program online and really thought it would benefit me and I think you'll like it too.

Hoping ya'll have a blessed and beautiful day!  Hugs...Tracy :)