Always On a Friday

I could have gone another ten years without seeing another hospital.  It seems like that's all we've done in the last few years.  But I'm getting really good at waiting.  Maybe it's an age thing an I've developed patience.  Who knows. 

Of course having a Dr. like Doogie Howser made it a lot more relaxed.  I couldn't help but giggle.  No, not to his face.  I don't think he could even tell that I was thinking "Wow, you look a LOT like Doogie Howser".

It never fails.  It's always on a Friday when I go to the E.R.  OOPS, I'm ahead of myself.  Lets back up.......(pretend you see the picture spinning as we go back in time).

Yesterday morning I had an early morning appointment at the hospital to see a rheumatologist about some simple joint pain.  Actually, I wasn't even in pain but it took awhile to get the appointment with the specialist so I went on.  Neil went with me and boy was I glad he did.

The first hint of trouble was the nurse's look on her face when she too my vitals and then said "are you feeling alright?". 

(me) Just fine.
(nurse)  Your not dizzy, lightheaded anything like that?

(me) Nope.

(nurse) Well, your pulse is only 36.  You sure you feel okay.

By now, I'm thinking, 'I look okay, don't I'. 

(me) I'm sure.

(nurse) Let me go talk to someone.

She comes back and they told her to take it manually.  It's better.  It's 44.

Neil and I just look at each other.  The Dr. comes in and we go over aches and pains.  He gets a podiatrist.  We decide it's arthritis in my big toe.  Geez, what a way to start a Friday and all because of the BIG toe.  Could you make me feel any older.  Uh' Yeah, it's coming.  We also need an xray of that shoulder that has the crackling sound and a blood test to check for gout.  It's doubtful, but we want to rule it out.  So at this point, I'm feeling a little deflated.  Should I go home and take a break in the rocker?  Okay, you're going to refer me to a podiatrist, schedule some  xrays and blood test.

Now, he says "I'd like to take your pulse and blood pressure again".  Okay, it's all over the place, so naturally it's time to talk about that.  "I feel great - fine.  Could it be because I didn't sleep much last night"?  No.

I told him about 2 weeks ago, I had a brief episode but it passed and I didn't do anything about it.  I'd been tired all this week but I thought that I just didn't have any energy and then I got kinda down on myself for not accomplishing anything.  At that point, I even thought maybe I'm going into a little depression funk and that's whats wrong.

Now, he has decided that I have to go straight to the ER downstairs.  Do not pass the exit sign.  Do not go get that Hardees ham biscuit that I'd been drooling about for the last hour and a half.  Straight to E.R.

Are you kidding me?  On a Friday, again?  I've been to the ER once a year for the last 2 years on a Friday and had to stay 3 to 5 days each time.

I'm still not worried.  I feel fine, ridiculous but fine.  I mean, here I am surround by moaning people and I'm just sauntering over there to the desk, as pretty as you please, smiling and joking.

More pulse checks.  More up and down numbers.  Then waiting.   Me in one area.  Neil in another. 

Time to see the triage nurse.  Another check.  Let me go see if I've got a bed.  Again, are you kidding me.   I'm serious.  Look at the sick people around me.  I'm laughing, are you kidding me?  She comes back, they just filled that bed.  I told her "I'm sure you've got a lot of people that need to be seen before me". 

She's pulling a manual at this point and says "I'm putting you in the priority red folder.  I can't get you a bed now but you'll be next, I'm expediting it". 

Still not getting hysterical but come on, if you're trying to get me to feel sick, you're kinda getting there.

So I wait 5 more mins, they call my name and I can see holes being burned in my back as I clomp pass everyone in heels at a speedy little pace.  Ya'll should be laughing by now, just picturing this.  Here's a gown, please get undressed.

Now, in comes Doogie, in record time.  Actually smaller than Doogie, looks - oh' about 16, super upbeat, not a care in the world, but I notice a wedding ring and that relives my feeling about him being under 18.  Just kidding, I liked him a lot and even with his jovial manner he inspired a lot of confidence.

He orders and ECG and a chest xray.  Oh' lets don't forget about blood test.  Neil's finally with me.  Looking a little shell shocked.  The Doogie comes back and talks to us about pace makers but in the mean time since there's something electrical going on I'm going to go ahead and have you set up in case something happens and I need to shock your heart.  WHAT!!!!!!

All in all, test are done, my heart rhythm is weird but I'm good to go.  Thumbs up from Doogie.  Oh' and the nurse in the mean time, killed me inserting an IV line that I didn't need just to take blood.  Thanks for that! (sarcasm)

Finally 2:30 pm, I'm outta there with a referral to the cardiologist, the podiatrist, blood work to do, more xrays to be done and an appt with my primary next week.  Oh' gee..the fun begins........

I went home slept for 5 hours straight.  And about 3am cried like a baby for no real reason at all.  Didn't really know why I was crying.  I think my body just decided it had been a long day.

Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get!