Everything Southern & So Cotton Pickin Cute

Thursday, February 10, 2011

I'm Glad I Didn't Miss the Dance

I must be on a song roll this month because I've got another one to share with you today.  Do you remember Garth Brooks song "The Dance"?  I know this song was written about a romantic couples time together but I have a little different spin on it.  Whenever I hear this song I think about both my Mama and Daddy.  Take a minute to read the words and I'll explain.

The Dance by Garth Brooks

Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared 'neath the stars alone
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye

And now I'm glad I didn't know

The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance

Holding you I held everything

For a moment wasn't I a king
But if I'd only known how the king would fall
Hey who's to say you know I might have changed it all

And now I'm glad I didn't know

The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance

Yes my life is better left to chance

I could have missed the pain but I'd have had to miss the dance
My parents both have had birthdays this month.  Mama's is on Feb 18th and Daddy's is on Feb 23rd.  
I lost Mama in January 1987.  I was only 26.  It was such a shock and unbelievably painful.  Which I know it is for anyone any age.  I found her on the kitchen floor and though it doesn't hurt as bad I can still see her face so clearly at that moment.
Daddy died the very next year in March almost 14 months later.  Another find and another shock.  How could this have happened.  What was most painful was that the night before I told him that Ty and I were planning on moving into an apartment.  He was really upset about that.  The next morning he didn't wake us up like usual.  I found him in bed.  He was gone.

My life was a blur of pain after that.  I was a wreck.  I felt like an orphan.  Ty lost the Grandparents that, as he said in his own words, were like losing a second mom and dad.  He was only 8 years old.  I was a kid who always had my parents to come back too and here he was left with me and I'm sure thinking what will happen without Grandma and Granddaddy.  They made life so safe for both of us.  

My sister Joni lived in Atlanta with her 3 young children but it was the same for her.  Mama and Daddy were always there, always safe and protecting, always taking care of us.

I'm so grateful that God doesn't share his life plan with us.  I just know if he would have, I would have pulled back for fear of the pain.  I would have missed The Dance.  

Thank you Lord for giving me their undying love for the time I had it.  I am who I am because I didn't know the pain to come and I was able to love fully and deeply.

Now I smile when I think of The Dance.


  1. life is so full of, well, life. with life comes love, and pain and loss. But we must live and we can make a choice to live to the fullest..and dance dance dance.. or to sit on the side lines watching everyone else dance, being fearful of getting hurt. I cant imagine the pain of losing your parents like that! that is sad. but I'm glad you kept on danching and that you pulled your life together and carried on.. thats what we do.. right!?
    I like that sone "I hope you dance" too. its kind of fun to think of life as a dance!
    have a sweet day!

  2. Tracey that is a beautiful story and and a beautiful song.I never really paid to much attention to the words. I like seeing them written down..it gives you a better understanding of the song..lol
    In my life I am really glad I don't see the big picture..I might not like what I see.I just Trust Him to do what is best for me.My way I am sure I would get into trouble..lol

    Hugs and have a great day. Cindy from Rick-Rick and Gingham

  3. I did it again..I threw an e in your name..lol So sorry my cousin is spelt that way...50 years of writitng it.I will soooo try to do it right!!
    Hugs Cindy

  4. Oh Nan,
    Our stories are almost identical! I was 27 when my Mom died, and 14 months later my Dad passed.....and I often think about what would have been different had I know I was to have them for such a short period of time.....Wonderful photos of your Mom and Dad....and I love Garth's THE DANCE......one more reason I feel so connected! I knew that you had lsot them young, but for the story to be so similar......wow.....Big Hug! Sandy

  5. Great post. I am learning to dance for the very first time...alone. Scary, but all will eventually work out I'm sure.
    Such silly things enter my mind...like I have no one to dance with at my son's wedding when it's time for the parents dance.....the soon to be ex uninvited since he tried to cancel the venue on our son and his fiance.
    I'm so glad you got to enjoy your parents to the very end.

  6. ((HUGS)). My mom passed away when I was 21. My dad is still alive but we arent close. He's 72 (I'm 27), so I know it probably wont be much longer. But his mom did just pass away at 100, so I guess you never know.

  7. I can absolutely relate! We(my family)have been in a season of difficulty and pain for a long while now. Yet, looking back, I would not change a thing. We have grown in grace; our relationship with the Lord and with one another, and our faith has been made stronger.
    Yes, God knows what lies on each of our paths and He is the one in control. It is so much better to just say "yes" to Him and allow him to lead. Because at the end of the day, we are safe in His arms! (There's a song for that too!) ;)
    Blessings and hugs,

  8. Aaww Tracy, your post is such a bittersweet reminder of how fragile life and our relationships are. Hugs and blessings to you, Nan