Everything Southern & So Cotton Pickin Cute

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Things are Slowy Getting Back to Normal

Well at least for the next few hours.  Our Lord is teaching me patience in the moments of panic.  In this rushed season I'm an learning to take things as they come which can change at a moments notice.

One thing I am blessed to have is my joy back.  My joy for Christmas this year with no expectations.  I'm happy to have the blessing of peace in my home.  The tenderness of love so long missed.

Our days are like a roller coaster now but there is an underlying calm and security knowing God has answered so many prayers for my family and me.  I know this is due to the links of a strong prayer chain.  You can't imagine how I hurt last year at this time.  If you would have asked me only two months ago what my future held I would have told you I had no idea and no real hope.  I would have said my family life was hopeless.  Thank God our sweet, loving Savior didn't give up on the girl with the poor attitude and low self esteem.  The hopeless seeming girl who couldn't bring love to anyone around her.

But I'm drifting off subject again....
My MIL Nadine has been transfer back to the nursing/rehab.  Neil was in a good mood after seeing her the night she transferred but the next evening came home in tears.  She was in bed, not responding, and moaning.  He must have cried the whole way home.  I could see it as soon as he walked in the door.  

Yesterday we went together to visit her and found her in her room sitting in the wheel chair.  We were both so surprised to see her looking well and being in such a good mood.  See, this is what I mean about a roller-coaster.  Bless her heart, she's kind of hard to understand now and not much makes sense but still it was a big relief to Neil and me too.  Neil didn't sleep at all the night before.  When we asked her what she'd been doing, she said making beds and cleaning the bathroom, washing clothes, stuff like that.  She told us about riding out to Callahan to get something for Neil.  She said she told her Mom that Neil would be coming by.  Of course her Mother has been gone since Neil was young.  I don't mind hearing these things if she's happy and she certainly seemed to be.  We took her for a stroll in the wheel chair and they have a sweet little ice cream parlor opened for 2 hours, 3 days a week.  We went in and got her some.  It was the first thing she has literally  put in her mouth in at least a month since she's been on the feeding tubes and pegs.  It was wonderful seeing her enjoy it but you could tell she's weak and really doesn't remember how to eat but it all came back.  She doesn't even realize that she doesn't eat food anymore.  Then we went in the dining room where they had someone come in to play the piano and sing.  There were lots of Christmas carols.  He even sang Route 66, a Nat King Cole standard, that made me think of Paula from Paula's Altered Palace of Art.  And my favorite "Fly Me to the Moon"!  Oh' how I love those beautiful old songs and NO I'm not that old.  

So to tie that up with a bow we had a very nice day.  We came home to record cold weather (low of 22 degrees), That's cold in Florida!!!  Luckily I had made a big batch of chili a week or so ago and taken some out of the freezer.  YUM!!!

Between the hospital and trying to keep up with a couple of swaps that I had already committed to I haven't been able to get to you wonderful, sweet and loving friends that have comforted me through this.  But I've got my swaps done and the trees started so I hope to get online tonight or tomorrow because I want to let each one of you know what you've meant.

So here's to hoping and wishing that in your hearts you already know how much you mean to me, that you're keeping warm and cozy today and that your enjoying the spirit of the season as much as I am.  I could just cry in the most wonderful way today!!!

Loads of love, hugs and happy wishesGod bless y'all,
Tracy :)


  1. I needed that post. I needed to hear that your MIL was finding her way thru her illness. I used to work in a residentail facility with folks with Alzheimer's AND my mother had crazy dementia when she first became ill...the stories I could tell! The thing we have to remember is that the regression back to a former life, if it is a peaceful one, is ok. Best to go along with it if it does no harm...then everyone is happier.

  2. Tracy, I'm glad to hear your MIL is doing a little better and you were able to enjoy the day with her. I didn't know you a year ago but I'd be willing to bet you are harder on yourself than you need to be. I see so much love and compassion for your MIL and family AND an unshakable FAITH every time I come here to visit. You are a blessing to many, hugs, Nan

  3. Tracy Suzanne...thanks for the update on your MIL. So sorry that you are both going through such a rough time right now. I wish I was close by to give you a hug!

  4. Tracy,
    I am SO glad to hear things are changing for you and your husband! I think when we are in that "poor me" place God loves us even more! I am struggling right now with major change and conflict and I have to believe he is watching over me as I write this! There is some peace in that, amid all of the chaos.....have a good night! Sandy

  5. Oh Tracy.... JOY JOY JOY...That was mine and Mitzi's word for the year and now you have it!!! I'm so very happy for you...Happy Holidays, I'm so relieved things are going better for you! Happy Happy Holidays! XO XO Keke
    P.S. Remember that song we used to sing in Sunday school when we were little.... I've got the joy,joy,joy,joy, down it my heart, where? Down in my heart, where? LOL Remember the second verse? I have the peace that passes understanding down in my heart, where? Down in my heart....sorry got carried away...now it's stuck in my head!!

  6. God is good all the time and all the time God is good.
    Keeping y'all in prayer.

  7. Tracy,

    I hope you see this in time...I know your swamped with everything, but I wanted to let you know I'm having a give away at Cherry Kingdom and wanted you to be able to throw your name in the Santa hat!! XO Keke

  8. I can sympathize with you. My MIL has been in and out of the hospital , recently put on Hospice. She has days where she doesn't get out of bed and then she is suddenly up and feeling well. My heart and prayers go out to you and your husband during this difficult time. I know it makes the holidays a very emotional time.
    Blessings, peace and hugs~

  9. Tracy good to hear your mother in law at least got up and doing something enjoyable with you.

  10. Hi Tracy!
    Your post was so wonderful to hear. I am hoping things are still going well for Nadine, and you and Neil too!

    It's the tiny little things in life that make it sweet, isn't it?
    Take care, thinking of you so much,

  11. (((Tracy))) So glad you and Neil had a good day with his mother. She's rembering a time in her life so long ago, just go with it and take it one day at a time. Before my Dad passed he had dementia. He was the last one alive of that generation, so there was no one to ask if the stories he told were true or not. We were lucky that he always remembered who we were. But the things he did and said..wow!
    Unfortunatly it will probably still be a roller coaster. Take the good with the bad and on those bad rememeber the good. It's so hard to see our parents in this situation. It makes you feel so helpless. But as long as they are safe, being cared for and seem happy, that's all we can ask for. Praying for more good days for all of you.
    Sending warm caring hugs...be sure to take care of YOU! Eat well, try to get plenty of sleep and do something you enjoy. The latter is the most important for me. It took a long time for me to see that...I felt guilty anytime I had any pleasure. We always think of ourselves last. I've finally learned to listen to my body and even my mind. My husband broke his back 15 yrs ago and became disabled. He has emotional problems from not being able to work and 'be a man and take care of his family'...that whole macho thing. Anyway, I've learned that I need to enjoy my life in order to be stable enough to take care of him. So I eventually ventured out and take the kids, without my husband, to do things, etc.
    I think I'm blabbering on, sorry. What I'm trying to say is its is ok to be happy. If your not, fake it. Sometimes that helps me thru also. Before I know it I feel a little better.
    I'm so glad you are feeling the Spirit of Christmas this year. Revel in it!
    God bless you!

  12. Hello Tracy~It's good to see you've been able to find those precious moments that bring small glimpses of happiness to your MIL.
    I know the ups and downs can be daunting.
    When we were caring for my MIL, she would light up by the simplest of pleasures too. She'd love it when we'd sit listening to her big band CD's, especially at the holidays.
    Now when my hubs and I missing them throughout the holidays we find solace in playing those big band Cd's and reminiscing about our folks.

    We're making slow progress decking the halls at my home. Hubs cut our Christmas "TREEZILLA"!! down from the backyard this weekend. Turns out what grows outside really appears much smaller then you think, lol. With my college boy home it has put us in a festive mood.
    Do you like playing Christmas music while decorating? For me the music welcomes a wonderful sentiment of the season to the air, as does the aromas of baking.

    It's good to be back, I hope you get a chance to stop by for a visit.

    Sweet wishes,