Sometimes we get so busy in our lives we forget how much we matter to other people.
We sometimes think "my comment won't matter" or perhaps it's a simple as thinking "There are so many other people around, I won't be missed". Well I'm here to remind you, that it's just not true. Each and every person matters. Each and every act of kindness matters. No matter how big or small, a gentle word, a gentle touch, sometimes it's even as simple as a smile. It can change someones whole day. That's also how we spread the love of God.
GOD shines through in those simple or extraordinary things we do. Your kindness may be what makes someone ask what is that special something that you possess and then cause them to think more about Christ's love.
I got a little off track but what I mean to say is, all the kindness we've received from you never went un-noticed. It touched our hearts and gave us strength in our time of need. And I still feel that love today. It's given me the peace and comfort to get up and get started again.
Speaking of which...........
I'm totally backed up and didn't get nearly what I wanted done today but I did get some things done, so that is as my friend Kate said "steps forward". Can you believe I still have 2 full size, overloaded Christmas trees to take down, yikes!!!! I've got reviews to post and GIVEAWAYS to post and most of all friends to visit in blogland and say thank you too.
Anyway next time you doubt that you matter, take it from me......YOU DO!!!
I had two giveaways that ended last week but wasn't able to post the winners with all I had going on with my MIL's passing. So lets get right to it.....
I've sent emails to both winners. Please let me know your addresses as soon as possible so that I can pass them on to the sponsors and get your prizes to you right away. A new winner will be chosen if I don't hear back after 48 hours.
Thanks to all my readers who enter this fun giveaways. And welcome to all my new followers!!! I'm so happy to read the comments from all my new and long time friends on Cotton Pickin Cute. Every comment is read and appreciated. I love to receive feedback so keep posting ya'll!
Don't forget, I have several new giveaways coming up, starting this week!
Moms funeral was today. It was very intimate and very peaceful. Saying goodbye is never easy but I think I said my goodbyes and the worst was over for me at the hospital. She'd fought so long and was deservedly tired. And even though my selfish side didn't want to see her leave, I knew how blessed her homecoming would be in heaven. Not only being welcomed into the loving arms of Jesus but to be reunited with her own mother, her two sons that had gone ahead and her husband that she hadn't seen for so long.
I consider myself so blessed to not only have had her as a mother-in-law, but to have had her as an adopted mother. She told me once that she'd always wanted a daughter and she got one with me. My heart is full. And we did have a strong and loving bond but truth be told she was such a loving person, I can't image her not loving any girl her son loved. Thank you God for putting such a good and loving person in my life, only 23 months after I'd lost my own mother. Twenty three must be an reoccurring theme because I'm so grateful to have been able to have known her for just a few days past 23 years. I only had my own mama 26 years, but thanks be to God I had an adopted mom for 23 more years.
I thought I'd share 2 things with you. First is the write up for the local obituary and second is the letter Neil spent the last 3 evening working on and crying over. He wanted to write a letter to his mom telling her just how much she meant. Then he wanted to share it with everyone at the viewing so he could let them know just how good she was.
Before you read them, I want to once again thank every single one of you for the loving prayers and thoughts that you've shared with us here. It's been a trying year and the last 2 weeks have really taken it's toll, I can't adequately express just how much your words got us through this time. And for all who have asked, Neil is doing so much better than I thought he would. He finally came to accept that the time to let her go was right and he'd done absolutely all and more than anyone can do. I think he's made peace with it the last few days though I know that there is going to many emotions to go through. Sorry that this post seems to go on and on, I consider so many of you friends and almost family and want to share it with you.
DOLLEY Nadine Cross Dolley, 91, passed away on January 7, 2012 in Jacksonville, FL. She was born on August 20, 1920 in Millen, Georgia to Augustus L. Cross and Nancy Allman Cross, the youngest of eight siblings. After graduating from Millen High School, she attended the Georgia State College for Women in Milledgeville, GA. After college, she worked for the government in Washington, D.C. and later, after her marriage, she worked in the banking field. She married William Henry Bill Dolley, Jr. on May 9, 1947 and was a Jacksonville resident for over 60 years, where she was a member of Arlington Presbyterian Church. Nadine was a kind hearted person, who devoted herself to raising her three sons and always helping others. She displayed amazing strength, when taking on the roles of both mother and father after the tragic and unexpected death of her husband, when her children were still very young. She endured many trials and always rose to meet them and was the strength that bound her family together. She enjoyed cooking, spending time with family and friends, dancing, fishing with her girlfriends and long rides in the country. She stayed very active well into her 80's. Nadine was preceded in death by her beloved husband, William Henry Bill Dolley, Jr; 2 sons, William Frederick Dolley & David Gilman Dolley; her brothers Allen Cross, Charlie Cross, Earl Cross, George Cross, Gus Cross & Pete Cross and sister, Lula Cross. She is survived by her loving son, Marchal Neil Dolley (Tracy); granddaughters Alisa Dolley Catanzaro & Erin Dolley Reed (Alex); great grandchildren Gage Wyatt Catanzaro, Gray Morgan Catanzaro, Emma Jill Reed & Lily Junco Reed and many extended family members and friends. Visitation will be held in George H. Hewell and Son Funeral Home, 4140 University Blvd., S. on Saturday, January 14, 2012 from 10 am until 11 am. A funeral service will be held at the graveside in Evergreen Cemetery Gate #5 on Saturday January 14, 2012 at 12:00 pm.
I found this beautiful song that I had forgotten all about, written by Vince Gill for country singer Keith Whately and it just seemed to be so old time country (even though it's not) and it expressed so much of how I feel how I feel. Thanks for letting me share it with you.
Dear Mom,
We both knew this day would come when God would decide it’s time to come home. Even though I know you’re in Heaven with William, David and Dad, it’s still hard to say goodbye. Not only did I loose my mom, I lost my best friend.
You know what Mom; I made a mistake the other day when I said Goodbye to you, that sounded like it was the last time I would ever see you, that’s not what I meant, so I’m taking it back. What I really meant to say was, Goodbye for now, I’ll see you soon.
Mom, I’ll never forget all that you’ve done for me over the years. Somehow you always knew the right words to say when I needed someone to lean on, you could always put a smile on my face even when I felt like crying.
Remember how I always told you that you were a special Mom, I’ve always known that, but now as I look back over the years, I realize just how special you really were. You made so many sacrifices over the years. I remember the times when you worked two jobs just to be sure your boys always had the best of everything. How you were able to raise three boys by yourself is a testament to just how special a Mom you were.
I just want you to know how proud I am and have been to be able to call you my Mom. I’m going to miss your beautiful smile and all the fun times we shared each day.
I could write a book about the great times we’ve shared together. As kids, I remember all of us riding the train at Six Gun Territory, all the times we would have cookouts at Little Talbot Island, standing waist high in the water with a string in one hand pulling in blue crabs.
As we got a little older, I remember spending weekends at the lake house fishing and skiing from morning till night.
And then there were the countless miles we’ve driven down the back roads of Georgia, having no clue where we were going or when we would be back, we stopped at every town along the way. As time past by, your memory starting fading a little and there were many times you’d say, I just want to visit my old home in Millen Georgia “just one more time”. You’re probably laughing about that right now because now you realize just how many times we actually went to see your home “one more time”, sometimes we drove there within weeks apart. But if was always fun. You loved those Georgia Pines.
I was reading through your Bible the other night, admiring all the notes you wrote, dating each and every one. You’ve had that bible for so long that it’s filled with little references you made along the way. I know you loved God, and I know God loved you, so as much as I will miss you; it gives me comfort knowing that you’re in Heaven now.
The last few years, I’m not sure who was taking care of who, I was suppose to be taking care of you, but the truth is you were actually taking care of me, and I will always love you for that.
Mom, I’m having a hard time ending this letter because I feel there is much more I should say. The truth is I don’t want to let you go. I’m trying to remember all the times you’ve told me this time would come, and how it wouldn’t be easy but as time passes it will become easier. Mom, I hope your right, because right now I really miss you.
So I suppose I should end this now, I want you to know that I will always cherish the times we spent together, no one can take that away.
It's early for me, before 9am. We're late sleepers, night workers here at home. I haven't had much trouble sleeping this week until last night. I finally got up at 6:30, after only sleeping a few hours. I'm waiting to call the funeral home to give the director some more information for the newspaper obituary. I spent a long time last night pondering, writing, running it by Neil and rewriting, just the right words to add to the paper. I'll share it with you later this week. There is so much I could say about this awesome women. So Southern and genteel. So tough as nails when it comes to caring for her family. The picture above pretty much sums up Neil's mom to me. The woman that I was lucky enough to think of as my own mother for many years. The woman that told me she always wanted a daughter and finally got one with me. I was so blessed to have known her and loved her and even more so to have her love me. I thank our heavenly Father, that only 2 years after my own mothers death, he saw fit to provide me with another mother for the last 23 years.
On another note, I've changed my email password and hope that this has taken care of the email hacking issue. I'm too afraid to email anyone. Thank you all for understanding and letting me know if you had an issue with my email, which many of you did. I will be emailing you soon.
I've just heard from several people that have received emails from me that my email has been hijacked. I got a weird message last week from someone I trust but it looked as if someone wrote over her email. Please let me know here on my blog if you've received anything strange from my email. I'm working on it.
And thank each one of you for your love and support at this trying time. We made the funeral arrangements tonight and will be having the funeral this Saturday.
Dear friends, thank you all for your words and prayers. I haven't even had a chance to come by and thank you all personally but I have said so many prayers of gratitude for all of you.
I'm still hoping that you can forgive me for asking for your continued prayers. Neil is suffering so much. Late last night he broke down and told me that he felt the hospital had lied to him and that she was suffering as she passed. I don't feel she was but that doesn't matter. It's what he feels that matters. He said she was scared and frighten and he let her down. He can't stop seeing her face as she took her last breath and he said he doesn't think he did the right thing. He also says he doesn't know how he can live with this. It's breaking my heart. To hear him say his last memory is seeing her face when she took her last breath is overwhelming. He was so close to her. (She was sedated but in his mind she was aware).
He took care of his mom better than anyone I've ever know. In the last 12 years I don't think we missed spending but a few dinners with her until she was in the nursing home last year. Even then he probably only missed visiting her 3 times before last week when he was sick most of it. It tears my heart up to see him suffering and I feel like a 8 year old girl just wanting someone to fix it. I'm begging for your prayers and any prayer chains you know.
I know that we're no different than anyone else experiencing the loss of a loved one but when it's your family going through it, it feels like the only thing in the world. I just don't know what I would do if something happened to Neil.
God Bless you all from the bottom of my heart......Tracy
Thank you all so much for being here for Neil and me. Each comment has comforted my heart and it's meant so much to Neil to hear that your all praying for him and his mother. When I can think clear and leave his side more than a few minutes at the time, I will be by to visit each of you. God bless everyone of you. My heart has so much love for you at this time. It's harder than we think it will be and without your words of compassion I don't think I could bare it. I'm so scared of the depression that is lurking ahead for us and trying to keep my sights on Gods promise and knowing she will be reunited with Neil's 2 brothers and his dad.
With a heart full of love and warmest hugs....Tracy ♥
